#gottman
23 articles on gottman.
- Therapy & Alternatives
How to Find a Good Couples Therapist: A Checklist
How to find a good couples therapist: a checklist for credentials, evidence-based modality (EFT, Gottman, IBCT), fit signals, and the red flags to avoid.
11 min read - Communication
Healthy vs Unhealthy Conflict: How to Tell the Difference
Healthy vs unhealthy conflict in relationships: the clear line between normal friction and the four horsemen, and how to move toward the healthy kind.
9 min read - Therapy & Alternatives
At-Home Premarital Counseling: A Free Six-Session Course
A free at-home premarital counseling course for engaged couples: six guided sessions on money, conflict, intimacy, and meaning, plus when to see a pro.
11 min read - Communication
Emotional Bids: How to Recognize and Turn Toward Them
Emotional bids are the small moves toward connection couples miss daily. Learn to spot them, make them clearly, and turn toward instead of away.
10 min read - Communication
How to Stop Arguing in a Relationship, Per the Research
How to stop arguing in a relationship: the research says zero conflict isn't the goal. Learn to fight better, repair faster, and stay reachable.
10 min read - Therapy & Alternatives
Gottman's Sound Relationship House: A Free Walkthrough
A free Gottman Sound Relationship House workbook walkthrough: all seven levels, a self-guided exercise for each, and where a therapist still helps.
10 min read - Communication
How to Express Appreciation in a Relationship
How to express appreciation in a relationship when you're out of practice: why it fades, the Gottman 5:1 ratio, and scripts that sound real, not forced.
10 min read - Therapy & Alternatives
Relationship Audit Checklist: Free Printable for Couples
A free printable relationship audit checklist covering friendship, repair, shared meaning, and fairness of load, plus how to debrief it without a fight.
11 min read - Communication
10 Daily Connection Rituals for Busy Couples (Under Two Minutes Each)
Daily connection rituals for busy couples: 10 research-backed micro-habits under two minutes each, anchored to the everyday transitions you already have.
10 min read - Communication
15 Softened Startup Examples From Gottman's Research
Softened startup examples, Gottman-style: 15 fill-in-the-blank scripts that raise a hard topic without defensiveness, with the harsh version beside each.
12 min read - Communication
Defensive Body Language in Relationships: What It Means
Defensive body language in relationships: why single cues mean nothing, which nonverbal clusters track with disconnection, and how to check.
11 min read - Communication
Micro Repair Attempts: 20 Small Moves That Save Big Fights
Micro repair attempts are the small mid-fight moves that de-escalate before flooding sets in. 20 examples couples can use, plus why accepting one matters.
11 min read - Communication
The Gottman Conflict Blueprint: 6 Steps, Explained
The Gottman conflict blueprint: 6 research-backed steps for a hard conversation, and how to tell solvable fights from perpetual ones.
10 min read - Modern Pressures
Phubbing Partner Validation Scripts: What to Say When You Feel Invisible
Phubbing partner validation scripts: exact phrases that name the loneliness without attacking, built on the Gottman complaint-not-criticism distinction.
10 min read - Modern Pressures
Digital Distraction and Gottman's Four Horsemen
How digital distraction feeds Gottman's Four Horsemen: the technoference research, the causal path from phubbing to contempt, and how to interrupt it.
10 min read - Therapy & Alternatives
Emotional Intimacy Mapping: A Checklist for Couples
An emotional intimacy mapping checklist that builds a visual map across four dimensions, so you can see where your connection is strong and where it's thin.
11 min read - Communication
The Six-Second Kiss: What It Is and Why It Works
The six second kiss ritual, explained: where the figure comes from, why duration is a proxy for attention, and 5 frictionless ways to turn toward your partner.
9 min read - Communication
Relationship Honesty Hour: 30 Prompts for the Conversation You've Been Avoiding
A relationship honesty hour, explained: the rules that keep it safe, when not to do it, and 30 tiered prompts from light warm-up to genuinely vulnerable.
10 min read - Therapy & Alternatives
DIY Marriage Counseling Exercises to Do at Home
DIY marriage counseling exercises for home: the Gottman, EFT, NVC and Imago protocols, the limits of self-guided work, and when to bring in a clinician.
30 min read - Communication
The Gottman 5:1 Ratio: What It Is and How to Measure It
The Gottman 5:1 ratio explained: what 40 years of research shows about the positive-to-negative balance that predicts lasting love.
9 min read - Communication
How to Complain Without Criticizing: Gottman's First Horseman and What Replaces It
Criticism predicts divorce; complaint doesn't. The Gottman distinction, with 12 examples of turning a critical line into a useful complaint.
8 min read - Communication
Couples Communication Exercises to Do at Home
Couples communication exercises you can do at home: scripts for hard conversations, repair after a fight, and the patterns that predict lasting closeness.
26 min read - Communication
How to Repair After a Fight: A Step-by-Step Conflict Recovery Guide for Couples
The complete guide to repair after a fight: the Gottman aftermath framework, de-escalation scripts, what to do in the next 24 hours, and how to break the loop.
27 min read